Steps in strength.

I wonder if I seem boring. I wonder if I just hide my private life well. Or I may make myself look friendless. Or maybe I’m just insecure. Like profoundly. I sit here and think of words spoken to me today and I can’t help but think that that is all a possibility. It shot me down like a hurtling bomb. Or maybe more like a denied dream. I told myself to shrug it off in the moment but it just blew up in my face like a well, hurtling bomb. And there goes my securities. Roger? In confidence? In fearlessness? Nothing. Pure silence. My poor little brain didn’t know what to do other than maybe run to the bathroom and cry. I know I said I wanted to be stronger but sometimes God throws these bombs at us all to see if we can handle it, and to celebrate anything I can say I didn’t cry. I just forgave. Maybe strength is measured in all the times we find the clout to will forgiveness, or allow ourselves to not feel bad for our, well, selves.

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